Sunday, January 02, 2005
oh well...

since the last time i did this... i liked a girl sooo much in the end.. i think she ended up using me.. instead of liking me..  she knew i liked her.. i guess the was a bad move.. it sooo much harder when a guy likes a girl than the other way around.. when a girl likes a guy " she " in my opinion wont go sooo far out of her way to try to get him.. us guys are.. i guess we dumb like that. lol since this all said and done.. i guess the last time i saw her was december 26, 2004 i guess what i felt for her diminshed as well... she was taking too long if she wanted to say something she had plenty of chances and its not like a didnt give her a chance.. she obvoiusly knew how much i cared for her. like what fabolous said.. the best things comes to those who wait for it.. so imma be straight forward before its too late for it... but i guess that didnt work out 2 well LoL ... oh well i have someone new in mind but..... i still am checking the field on this one cuz in the end LoL she might be my wife... LoL fun fun fun

Posted at 10:43 pm by Revolver
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Sunday, December 12, 2004
Ms. Lucero... LoL

LoL i dont know what to say but i like her alot LoL... i cant stop thinking about her .... lol kong alam lang nya sha na pili ko.. Awon ko anong gagawin ko kong magin sho ta ko sha lol besides alam ko hindi pwede bcuz we know each other so good its creepy.... but i dont know what else to say.. LoL who knows maybe one day when i decide to finally say what i want to say to her face to face instead of in my mind playing like a horrible sounding replay. I guess i gotta build enough confidence to do so LoL right now im kind of the weird moment... for example 2 nights ago i was supposed to go out with her and the boys.. but instead someone up above decided to test me see if i knew how to bide my time well... obviously i failed bcuz i didnt want to disappoint one or the other i ended disappointing them both LoL i know its not funny but what else can you do? All i know is that i want to keep this strictly friend like. Its better to have her as a friend than not to have her at all... ~ but shush... ~ secretly im falling in love with her ~ lol what a sap ? i am or what a sucker i have become lol either way.. this was fun sorry i havent bloged in a while.. man i havent gone to the gym in 4 days im beginning to hate this.... screw it im going to the gym tomorrow regardless if jon either does show or does not.. LoL blog again sometime.. ~ ciao..


~revolver...

Posted at 10:00 pm by Revolver
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Friday, August 20, 2004
Freaking Weird ?

hmm... thats one way to start this i guess. since from my last post a lot has happened... MB and i got a lil bit closer friendship wise at least but its the weirdest thing. I guess it may have been after i told her about the way i feel about her. i dont know.. but since after that we have been hanging out a whole lot more than usual. hell ive been teaching her tagalog. weird. Also i guess i can kinda sense when she wants my company or when we've been hanging out with each other for a while we kinda give off the time to back away feeling. I guess it would have been alot easier if she hadnt said the last thing i remember her sayin when we were talkin about how we are friends wise. it still lingers in my head a lil she said " you dont have anything to worry about or no one to compete against. " i dont know it sounds weird or maybe it just sounds weird to me. Another thing is i cant stop talkin about her to friends and family etc, or the fact when she calls it makes me smile but i guess the only thing that really kills me in her flirtatious attitude but i guess you cant have it all right ? i mean im just happy enjoyin the time i have when her and i go out. IT IS friendship right ? but lil by lil i guess its the little things back then she would never let me win a conversation. but today ... today out of all days she lets me win and the funny thing is when i confronted her with it all she did was smile and continue dancing. I really dont know whats going on. i guess its easier to type this all up and turn and look back to see whats going on. Hmm does she kick it with me cuz the fact she doesnt have to drive ? does she hang out with me bcuz that i treat her out alot (basically money), or she hangs with me bcuz she knows i wouldnt do anything bad to harm her in any situations or hurt her feelings. Sometimes i have to admit it kinda bums me out when shes being flirtatious to other guys in a way i would say a lil jealousy maybe bcuz i like her ? I dont know i mean the last time i brought her to a get together with the
" boys " she was practically all over them eh ill give that to the alcohol but this time its gonna be FC party and she with her friends will be all there everything is all fine and everything until she starts drinking then from there we shall see who her true colors are. I supposed FC party is the only sure fire way to see if she still has a lil fire left for DD. The " boys " dont help out the situation any better they are constantly givin me shit cuz i hang out with her alot..... man i just realized how long this blog really is. LoL in retrospec i can also see why she would be " using " me. I mean i do spoil the girl but oh well why not im a nice guy anyway....i guess ill have to blog again 5 days from now and we shall see if its good or bad regardless either way. If i get hurt during this party or not , i will still be her friend.... LoL then i wonder why i get depressed right ? LoL maybe its bcuz the fact i want a gf so bad i dont really care who it is as long as shes there for me as i am for her....... man this sucks its already 11:30 pm and i have to be at work at 5am....... Oh i just got promoted to Ramp Lead freakin weird huh.. never thought that would have happened..... good night good game and thanks for letting me blog.... till 5 days from now.. ~ ciao... 

Posted at 11:31 pm by Revolver
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Wednesday, July 28, 2004
A crush or something else ?

i guess its been awhile since i wrote the last time i wrote i was talkin about counter-strike a game now i believe its something different maybe im letting my guard down again but since i started talkin to this girl maybe getting to know her a little better i think its the fact i missjudged her or its the fact shes just there at the right time. its been awhile since i opened up again. The last time i did i got hurt pretty bad . I seem to get mixed emotions with her though i think sometimes she's into me then at times i think shes pushing me away and doesnt want to have anything from me. Her name will remain anonymous but ill use her initials anyway its M.B. she has alot of things going on with her and surprisingly after i got to know her she was nowhere near from what i thought she was i guess the clich'e judging a book by its cover came into effect. From what i know shes into a friend of mine his initials are D.D. but i know at least from what he told me hes not interested in her. I dont feel trying to go for her maybe its pride maybe its self-doubt i dont know. but wtf when i receive a call from its actually kind of a good feeling. i dont know ... i guess only time will tell whatever happens, happens but hopefully the outcome can either be good or bad prefably good rather than bad buts a gimme.... i guess ill have to wait and see how this one will work out if even if theres nothing at all. dammit i work tomorrow i guess i have to cut this short. ill blog again soon...

Posted at 12:14 am by Revolver
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Wednesday, June 23, 2004
Counter Strike pt1

hmm.. i guess ill start this one off with what obviously is the front title... LoL i started playing this freaking old yet addicting game.. i got several of friends to try it out they started liking it so therefore here i am again.. i thought being rusty for such a long time i lose some of my so-called skill LoL and for my friends who ever reads it they know im not a big lanner game person but today we had a good 10 vs 10 to me thats alot. lol surprisingly i had a really high ratio i was at the top on everymap.. LoL scary...  the last score i had when i left the game was 41 - 8 not bad for someone who has been out of the game for such a long time.. ive been here at CyberZone for almost 4 hours now since im not planning on wasting my precious minutes i thought why not make a blog here man this game is far to addicting i got nothing better to do. LoL im watching my friend G who just got stabbed in the back right now for not paying attention LoL they are enjoying this game way to much i cant believe im gonna be going back to my 2 dollar an hour rate of playing this game oh well i guess i cant complain much.. it does kill time and it is my dayoff so why the hell not...  I just realized something ... im really really hungry LoL and to top it off ive smoked about 15 cigarettes playing the game and just sitting here making this blog... oh plus listening to my hi energy music ... great someone is smoking a pipe cigar now.. that smells hella bad.. i hate that shit...  oh well i guess thats it for now.. blog again tomorrow. hopefully ..

~ Revolver.

Posted at 12:20 am by Revolver
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Friday, June 18, 2004
Regular life again " yay! "

hmm let me start this with a weird note... im pretty close to gettin termed at the job LoL plus with the new bid coming up i dont even know how long am i gonna last two 5 am morning shifts granted i could have taken the one with all five , 5 am morning shifts but i guess im used to the tues and weds off plus i have that feeling the bosses are losing their faith they have in me and my lead also my co-workers... man... i dont know how this gonna end up at least whatever happens i need NEED a contigency plan just in case the worse of the worse happens i gotta keep options open.. well i gotta rest up soon cuz i gotta be at work at 5am in the morning ... wow.. regular life sucks.. LoL hahahahahahaha

Posted at 07:45 pm by Revolver
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Thursday, June 17, 2004
2 months of a circus ride

hmm.. i guess it would start at the month of May where out of nowhere a dear old friend talked to me. Obviously anyone who ever reads this besides myself would know who SHE is. Well before i completely go off topic. It started out to a little talking then started seeing each other we were friends for 3 yrs already to make this more than friends is kinda takin a risk IT IS A RISK but it was worth taking " at least for her " . For the first two weeks i guess everything was doing ok but then after that it would be the beginning week of june it started going a little weird i guess i dont know what was going on. In my opinion it was still going ok but i guess it was not... I guess the old saying was correct BEST FRIENDS MAKE BEST LOVERS OR BEST ENEMIES.. by the way im going with this im hoping people who read this can see which road was chosen.. LoL i guess .. As far details ill leave that blank. This was a weird situation though i have to admit we have been only together for a month. but it took about two weeks to get over it maybe being friends for three years got something to do with that. but the fact one can just waste the three years and just say it was a mistake you have to kinda take that in consideration to be a lil messed up. People make mistakes dammit thats what makes us human... LoL... oh.. well.. i guess im over it now im beginning to get my schedule straight again it was weird though i would have given her the world....... funny thing is also that i never ASKED to be that happy i was enjoying my tedious schedule. i guess thats HIS version of being funny. i guess thats it for now i dont know what else to say ill try to keep up with this again. .... ``~~~~~~ till tomorrow...

Posted at 11:35 pm by Revolver
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Friday, January 02, 2004
OMG...

well... here is what im gonna do to start this ... well i lost my holiday pay today because i had to go home.. i went to work at 14:30 and i left at 16:00 i know it was only like a hour and a half but i couldnt breathe.. for shit.. every little bag i throw i was out of breath i couldnt inhale for shit.. so i told my lead Robert i had to go i said i was gonna go to UMC but that would have been plain stupid because of the fact its New Year's day i can only imagine how many people are in there. So I guess when i got home my mom was already waiting outside for me. I told her i was ok to drive home.. but she stayed outside to wait for me anyway.. She also called my cousin who is a paramedic for southwest.. she told me that he was coming down so i laid on the couch for what it seemed a min or two when he got there my cousin woke me up it had been two hours passed he brought a tank and a couple of some kind of antibiotics i thought i was gonna get some kind of shot but instead i was basically breathing in the medicine lol he called it " smoking the peace pipe " lol but it did help i was able to breath easily again. but OMG when i hacked up to spit i had this weird metallic taste in everytime i spit OMG it was the nastiest shit ever.... oh well i took some Benadryll i think thats how its spelled i went to sleep but i just woke up again 5 hours later... my chest still hurts when i cough but at least i can breathe again.. whew... close call on that

Blog again soon

Posted at 06:35 am by Revolver
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Tuesday, December 30, 2003
Its been awhile...

lol wow its been a long time since ive wrote some of my thoughts down oh well here it goes oh btw did i mention i cant sleep... its been this way for about a week now... i hate it.. well lets see friends came and go .. but oh well um.. i finished nfs underground almost 3 times that means i got 3 separate accounts of cars its pretty trippy fun fun fun also catched alot of the new movies.. you know what ever movie that i see im gonna write a lil summary about it um.. i started playing animal crossing again.. thats always fun.. oooh ooh i got a new phone its the sony ericcson P800 its bad ass touch screen and everything hehe um... didnt do shit on christmas and nor do i care.. i aint doing shit on New years eve either i could care less in my opinion its all over rated shit hmm... so far thats about it oh ya um.. hahahhahahaah i saw it coming lol hahahahahahahahahahahahaahh oh well next time.

Posted at 04:47 am by Revolver
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Sunday, November 23, 2003
A Good Deed

hmm.. how should i start this off well today is 23rd of November its a Sunday its not really the sunday to me that made my night interesting... It started off when i picked up a Xtra shift on Fri. i started work early in the morning at 8am to 1pm i didnt have much sleep the night before lol i dont know why but i just didnt well when i was at work i had a great time its was Happy, me and Chapman on the SwissPort side doing the Transat flight and all 4 of the Transmeridian flights it wasnt much really but we all had a good laugh. This is where it gets interesting i came back for my second shift at night.. it was a pretty packed night we had Aviacsa and Air Canada ... Aviacsa was extremely bad.. we had to use 5 carts obviously to some people they wouldnt understand but 5 carts to one flight is just plain ridiculous well anyways back to the story when i went to go outside to the ticket counter to find out how many passengers we had left there stood a young woman... she had asked me about the early morning Hawaiian Airlines flight i didnt know much to tell her but i just noticed that she had been struck by obviously someone... she asked me if the Terminal was closing for the night or was it 24 hours .. I told her it does close at 1am. she looked like she was in despair... i dont know what really came over me but i decided to help her out. weird huh... so i decided to tell her instead of just waiting outside for the next 7 hours i decided to help her out i told her she can put her stuff in my truck and just wait in there till i got off work and maybe if she wanted to go grab some coffee or something well.... when she finally got in my truck i told her ill be back in a couple of hours she passed out quick ill assume she was really tired from all that quick moving and packing...... well after work we decided to just chill at my house for several hours until i got her back at the airport at 7 we practically talked the whole night i found we were from the same island except she was from the mililani side and i was from the waianae side it was pretty cool i had to admit.. ill fast forward the time its about 7am and we finally got the airport i also used a lil of my influence and i got all her things through where she didnt have to pay for excess weird i know but i wanted to make sure she had nothing to look back to. when she finally got checked in i stayed with her at the gate until she got on the plane.. i dont know why but u know what i feel extremely good about myself the fact that i got a person out of a really abusive relationship hmm.. i guess in my opinion i did good for myself but OTHERS dont think so... like ehm ehm u know who u are.... well i will leave this at this for now ill be back again to throw some thoughts up.
                                                                                                                         

Posted at 03:19 am by Revolver
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You are The Merovingian-
You are The Merovingian, from "The
Matrix." Wit and danger, with a French
twist. You are adamant about the slightly
materialistic things- power, wealth, posession.
Dominating, aren't we?




   

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